Fifteen years ago I was guided by the Divine Feminine to write about my experiences. God is both male and female; thus God is both Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine. This balance of the Divine can also be called Father/Mother God. It pleased me to be chosen for this task even though, at the same time, I was terrified at the thought of actually doing it. I know nothing about writing a book per se, so this is a conversation with all of you from my heart.
Three separate times I started to put it down on paper but each time I set it aside.
This is the memoir of the many challenges I had in life, yet each challenge led me to understanding what unconditional love actually is. Motherhood is the prime example of that type of love. In becoming a mother, you are not a mother just until your child reaches maturity; you are a mother until the day you die. No love is stronger than maternal love and there is nothing more fierce than a mother protecting her child.
Our bodies are holy temples that contain the organs for perpetuating the human race. Imagine the awesome responsibility of being aware that without the womb, there would be no future generation. I did not honor that fact until I was faced with the prospect of losing that precious organ. I honored that part of me the only way I knew how; I demanded it back after its removal from my body.
For as long as I can remember, I had a burning desire to have children. I could not wait to become a mother as I saw this to be the fulfillment of my destiny. Motherhood totally fulfilled my yearning to BE love and GIVE love.
Until I was faced with the reality of needing a hysterectomy, I never contemplated the uniqueness of the womb. I never even wondered if I would be able to bear children. I simply took for granted that my ability to have children was there, waiting for the appropriate time when I would be able to fulfill my destiny. Had I not experienced being a mother I would never have fully appreciated the gift of having a womb and the miracles that would come forth.
The womb is the cradle of humanity, where new beginnings are given the opportunity to grow so that the whole world may partake. Within the womb lay the mystery and the beauty of creation. And not just in the children that come forth, for the womb is a microcosm of All Creation. Even though today we have ultrasound machines which can monitor the progress of the fetus, there is truly no way to measure the unfolding evolvement of a human life.
When it became evident that I needed a hysterectomy, my spirit just cringed at the thought of my womb being treated as just something that was surgically removed from my human body. This tiny organ allowed me to fulfill what I felt was my mission on earth; to be a mother. I could not allow it to be treated indifferently.
In order to explain how this book evolved, I will start with my own beginning which is the story of my childhood. I took motherhood for granted even as a child. It felt ‘right” to assume that I would be a mother yet I never realized the twists and turns it would take to actually get me to the point of claiming and celebrating the divinity of the womb.
I went through all the phases of growing up to reach adulthood yet still did not fully recognize what unconditional love actually is. Motherhood taught me that. I had many opportunities to practice that particular kind of love. Today I know in my soul that LOVE encompasses and forgives all transgressions.
My hope is that my life experiences may bring remembrances that you are able to relate to and identify with. Perhaps they may bring some recognition of your own faith, love, and courage despite life’s outward appearances.